Winter is Coming

So, in Alaska, summer is almost over. The leaves are turning yellow and falling to the ground, and although it is still warm during the day, it has been getting cooler at night. The other night it got down to 43.

For me, as summer draws to an end, I start thinking about what I am going to do over the winter. This year, it is particularly on my mind, since summer most decidedly did not go as planned. Two of my big races got cancelled due to wildfires, and another I DNF'd.

I started Crossfit last winter and loved it, but quit going after a few weeks, because I felt like between that and running, I was tired all the time. I didn't realize this at the time, but my nutrition was also suffering, and in hindsight I am sure that contributed to being tired all the time. Also, I do not enjoy getting up early AT ALL. But there is a reason I started getting up early to go to Crossfit, and that is because it is the only time in my day I can fit it in, and I love the workouts, and the results.

I originally started running because I wanted to keep the weight off. I still run for that reason, but also because I have fallen in love with running. I don't love running on the treadmill so much, but I am willing to do it because it keeps me in shape over the winter. If I slacked off all winter long, starting up again in the spring would be so much harder. Running is a depreciable skill.

For a few years now, though, I have wanted to work on building body strength and muscle in places other than my legs. I have flirted with weight lifting, but doing the same routines over and over is super boring after just a few weeks. That's why I tried, and enjoyed, Crossfit. It is always a different workout, but over time, strengthens your entire body.

I said last winter that I wanted to focus on improving both my running and my overall strength, and wound up doing neither. I gained a bit of weight, which I have managed to lose again (I have a great nutrition plan when I follow it), slacked off on running, and only did the strength workouts for a couple of months. So I shouldn't have been surprised when this summer, I was plagued with one overuse injury after another, and went into my races undertrained. Then, after my last race, a marathon that I DNF'd at mile 19.5, partly because of a nagging injury, and partly because I just didn't feel like running anymore, I decided that for the rest of the summer, instead of stressing about a training plan that I wasn't following that well anyway, I was just going to run for fun and when, how far, and at what whatever pace I felt like.

I know I can perform better than I did this summer. I really want to see what I am capable of at peak performance. But I need to build up to that. So, here is my plan.

1. Continue to run every day. But plan short days where I really only run 1 easy mile.
2. For the first half of the winter, October through December, focus on speed.
3. For the second half of the winter, January through March/April, focus on building back up to be ready for long, technical summer running.
4. Crossfit. I really want to get back into it. And I think if I do it in a way that is smart, and for the first few months, keep most of my runs on the short side (ie no more than 4 or 5 miles), I should be better able to manage it without wearing myself out.
5. NUTRITION. I have been really focusing on improving my overall nutrition lately, and I want to continue that trend. I have found that the quality of the food I eat really plays a part in how I feel and how well I perform, and to maximize performance, I have to maximize nutrition.
6. Body composition: right now, although I am at a healthy weight, my body fat percentage is higher than I would like. Over the winter, I want to lean out, and build muscle, and bring that percentage closer to 22% or so, which I think would be ideal for performance, with my body type. I think if I can meet the rest of my goals, this one will fall into place.

In a couple of days, I am leaving for Utah, and will be gone for a week and a half. The day after I get back, I leave for Bethel for 5 days. So it won't be until mid September that I really have a chance to start Crossfit up again, but that is the plan. I think I'm going to see if they will let me take the starter lessons again so I remember the basic lifts, and then go from there. It should be fun!!

So, there you have it. I am going to try to keep track of how it is going, and how well I am sticking to the plan, If I don't track it or measure it, I will be less likely to follow through. I am not looking forward to winter, but at least I have a plan.

routines

I have been trying to find ways recently to simplify my life, and at the same time, make my daily life healthier. One of the ways I feel like I can make progress towards both of those goals at the same time is to develop healthy routines and implement them in my life.


Developing a routine can have a positive impact on your mental and physical health. It helps create healthy habits, aids in coping with change, and allows us to feel more in control of our overall health and wellbeing. It also provides structure in how we live our lives and conduct our daily activities. So it is easy to see how having healthy routines can help me reach my health and overall wellness goals more easily.

Since a routine is something that you do repeatedly, it eventually becomes a habit. This increases efficiency in our lives and enables us to do things without always consciously thinking about them. I do something called "habit stacking" to develop my routines and get to the point where I do them habitually. (There is a book on this topic, called.... Habit Stacking. Go figure.)

With habit stacking, you basically take something you do that is already a habit (such as brushing your teeth before bed), and add another small behavior (for example, washing your face) onto that habit, so the first habit (teeth brushing) becomes the cue to complete the second behavior (face washing).  I have developed entire routines of microhabits that are cued by doing a thing that is already a habit for me.

So, I have an evening routine, for example, that looks like this:

• brush teeth and put retainers on
• wash and moisturize face
• take meds/vitamins/supplements
• review my journal and add anything I wanted to and haven't yet
• check tomorrow's calendar, weather forecast and menu
• get meat out of the freezer for tomorrow's dinner
• set out clothes for tomorrow
• get my work bag ready for tomorrow
• double check alarm is set
• take contact lenses out
• go to bed

Having this set routine makes the going to bed process easier and helps me to calm down, as I don't rush through any of these things. Because I pre-prep for the next day, it also helps me start my morning off on the right foot. I am really not a morning person at all, so prepping for my morning the night before makes my mornings much less stressful and I don't get that "chicken with my head cut off" feeling. I am also much more likely to remember everything I need to take with me the next day if I get ready at night, instead of in the morning, since I am typically much more alert at night.


I also have a morning routine to help me get through the morning with as little chaos as possible, but it essentially boils down to:

• hit snooze about 5 times
• jump out of bed at the last minute
• shower
• throw my clothes on that I picked out last night (thank goodness I did that)
• start the crockpot if that is the plan for dinner (also a good thing I got the meat out last night)
• grab my work bag (pre-packed and ready to go)
• put my dog outside
• go to work

I am SO not a morning person but I am trying to make my mornings more productive and purposeful. I want to add yoga and meditation to my morning routine, but I have to break the snooze button habit for that to happen, lol. I am still working on building my morning routines, because mornings are so challenging for me. But I feel like it could be an important improvement in my health and daily life.


Establishing and following a healthy routine can improve the following MacroHabits of Health:

• Healthy Mind. A routine allows us to feel more in control and less stressed. Knowing that we’re preparing our evening meal at 6:00 p.m. and going to bed by 10:00 p.m. provides comfort and helps to eliminate uncertainty. Routines also let you get things done on "autopilot" so that you are expending less mental energy trying to remember to get everything done.

• Healthy Eating & Hydration. A routine allows us to block off dedicated time for meal planning and eating. Try setting an alarm every two – three hours as a reminder to have a fueling, healthy snack or small meal. Also dedicate some time on the weekends to plan your meals for the week ahead. Some people also find it very helpful to not only plan their meals, but prep a lot of their food, such as cutting up all your vegetables, mixing sauces, etc on the weekend so they have less to do to have a quick but healthy meal on the table after work.

• Healthy Motion. It can be difficult to fit healthy motion into our schedules when life gets busy. By having a routine, even if it’s only a couple of days a week, we can create time to incorporate motion into our days, whether it is just a little bit of increased activity, or formal exercise. If you plan to arrive somewhere a few minutes early, that gives you the time to stretch when you get out of the car, park further away and walk, take the stairs instead of the elevator, etc. Also, giving yourself time in the morning for a few minutes of stretching, yoga, or walking can help you wake up and increase your alertness in the morning.

• Healthy Sleep. Going to bed and waking up at the same time each day allows our bodies to get used to a regular sleep-wake cycle. It’s important to establish a regular sleep routine to feel well rested and to allow your body to recharge. Dedicate some time to winding down before getting in bed and aim to get between seven to nine hours of sleep each night. If possible, find a way to wake up that is less jarring than a sudden alarm. Some people find success with a light that gradually brightens to wake them, or with an alarm that starts quietly and increases slowly in volume, as opposed to a sudden loud noise waking you painfully and abruptly.

All of these things, reduced stress, improved nutrition and hydration, increased motion and better sleep are important to long-term health and longevity. As an Optavia coach, one of my major jobs is to help my clients establish these healthy routines and habits in their own lives, so if you need ideas or assistance, ask me! And remember, I am always working on improving my own! No one is perfect.

2019 summer plans

Soon, another summer will be here... the short, dim days and long, dark nights of winter are almost over. I made it through another one. Almost. Only two more winters to go.  I said a while back that we are moving to Hawaii, and I thought it would happen this summer.  However, my youngest is still in high school and is really thriving right now, so we have decided to put the move on hold until he graduates in 2021. So the pace has slowed down on moving prep, but its still in the works.

Once that decision was made, it made figuring out this summer a whole lot easier. I had no idea which races I should sign up for because who knew when the move would happen. But now? I can run ALL THE RACES.  But reality set in once again, and I can only actually run SOME OF THE RACES.  I picked:

• April 6: Valley Thaw Out 13.1 - just a little fun jaunt on local gravel roads. which I will use as a training run. This race is new this year, so it will be fun to check it out.
• April 13: KrrrBrr: however many loops most closely resemble my long run for that weekend... another fun one that was new last year and super informal. But I hear there are shirts this year!
• May 31-June 1: Alaska Endurance Trail Run, 24 hour timed run. I've run this twice before and it should be AWESOME. And bonus, my friend Michele is now running it with me. Last year I did 53 miles in 24 hours. I know I can beat that if I run smart. 
• Also in June on the 22nd, Kesugi Ridge full traverse (about 30 miles). This one will be challenging. I ran it two years ago, and missed the cut off at the halfway point.
• July 13: Angel Creek 50 miler. This one is my "A" race this year. I got lost in the fog during this race, and wound up scratching around mile 31-ish. I'm determined to finish it this year.
• August 4: Archangel 26.2. I did the opposite 26.2, Hatcher Pass Marathon, in 2017, and it was a lot of fun. That race was 25 miles uphill, then 1 mile down. This race runs the same course in the opposite direction, 1 mile uphill, then 25 miles down. Should be a blast.
• August 10: Resurrection Pass 50 miler: Another one I completed in 2017 in the absolute pouring rain, my first 50 mile finish. Hoping for better weather (and a better time) this year. 
• August 31 (?): A Day at the Beach 12 hour 

My "A" race, Angel Creek 50 miler, is only 124 days away, so I need to get cracking on the training. I have an ultrarunning coach and a solid training plan so I'm feeling optimistic. 

I put in 4 miles today, which were supposed to be at a steady pace. However, I'm in Homer, and I ran on the spit, in the wind, which was gusting to 30mph. That made for some extra resistance, and very uneven paces. That little 4 mile run was hard work! 

Where to run in Fairbanks, Alaska: Creamer’s Field

I do a lot of travelling, and I’m always trying to figure out where the best places to run are wherever I’m going. I’ve been in Fairbanks a lot lately, and I’m lucky enough to have a couple of running friends up there showing me their favorite spots. I figure I’m probably not the only one that wants to know ahead of time where they should go for good running, so I’m going to highlight a few of my favorites. First up, in what I think is my favorite right now in Fairbanks, is Creamer’s Field Migratory Waterfowl Refuge.

So, Creamer’s Field was started by a couple that brought three cows up to Fairbanks during the gold rush in the late 1800’s and started a dairy. It became the largest and most successful dairy in Interior Alaska, and was in operation until 1966. It is still farmed and managed with the goal of encouraging migratory birds to visit. The refuge currently has 2,200 acres of fields, woods, and ponds, and some of the historic dairy remains, and currently houses a visitor’s center and gift shop. The refuge is open year round, and the trails are groomed in winter. One thing runners need to keep in mind is that there is no potable water at Creamer’s Field, so BRING WATER WITH YOU.

A community organization, Friends of Creamer’s Field, provides guided nature walks and educational opportunities for visitors and there is a network of trails throughout the refuge. There are trails alongside the fields in the refuge, and a trail through boreal forest.

The boreal forest trail is a 1 mile loop, and there are parts of it that are just beautiful. There are long stretches of boardwalk that are really fun to run on, and a viewing platform that you can climb up to a bird’s eye view of the area.

 The boardwalks are my favorite part of the trails here, and I make sure I run them each time I visit.

There are only a few miles of trails on Creamer’s Field Migratory Waterfowl Refuge, but they connect to skiing and dog mushing trails that for the adventurous could add close to 30 extra miles of trails, depending on weather. When it’s rainy, some of those trails become inaccessible.

I really enjoy running here, and when I was here for a week earlier this month, I visited here twice to run. I love it that you can run in both woods and fields, on boardwalks and trails. The variety is fun, and the scenery is great. It’s totally awesome, and you should go.

Right round baby, right round, like a record baby…

SO.

Resurrection Pass 50 miler was this past Saturday.

Resurrection Pass trail (photo credit to Michele Harmeling)

I looked forward to this race all summer. Hell, ever since I finished it last year, I have looked forward to doing it again. I planned carefully, made sure I had everything I could possibly need, even talked a sucker friend into running it with me (Michele, you rock!!). Rented a hotel room near the race start, etc., etc. As of Friday afternoon when I got off work, everything was running smoothly, so I jumped in my car and headed towards Cooper Landing, full of optimism and excitement.

Resurrection Pass trail (photo credit to Michele Harmeling)

I had one errand to run in Anchorage, and then I was going to get my run in on the coastal trail, grab some dinner while I was in Anchorage, and then drive the rest of the way to Cooper Landing to check into my hotel. Best laid plans…

I pulled off the highway at the exit to the shopping center where I needed to run my errand, slowed to a stop at the light, and disaster struck. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, I suddenly felt dizzy, lightheaded, and incredibly nauseous. I was like, OMG, what the HECK is going on? I parked in the parking lot, and got out of the car, and had to lean on the car to stay standing up. Like, my legs totally wanted to buckle under me, I needed to throw up (I didn’t; I would do ANYTHING to not throw up), and the world spun around me. Like a record, baby, right round, round, round. Yeah, it was not pretty.

I got back in the car, and sat there, with my head pounding and my stomach in upheaval. I took some motion sickness medication that helped the last time this happened. I reclined the seat in the car and laid there for an eternity over an hour. I had to keep my eyes closed, because if my eyes were open, and I moved them at all, it made my head spin. The whole time, all I could think about was whether I could get things under control enough to get to Cooper Landing, and whether I would feel good enough to race the next day. After more than an hour, when I couldn’t stand it anymore, I called my daughter, Becky, who lives only one freeway exit away, to come over. She got there pretty quickly, and sat with me for a few minutes. It didn’t take long once she got there, however, for us to decide that she should take me to an urgent care place. I wasn’t thinking clearly. I was pretty sure there wasn’t anything an urgent care doc could have done, but I just desperately wanted to feel better, and was hoping there was some magic trick the urgent care doc could do to get me back on my feet and safely on my way. I also didn’t call James right away, partly because I didn’t want to worry him if I didn’t have to, but also partly because I knew he would put the cabosh on any further attempts to drive 2 or 3 more hours that night….

To make a long story short, the urgent care visit was a waste of time and money. The doc told me I had BPPV, benign paroxysmal positional vertigo, gave me a prescription for more motion sickness meds, and told me I couldn’t drive until I felt better, but if I felt better in the morning I could run. In the meantime, Becky told James where I was and what was going on, and he met us at the pharmacy after I left the urgent care place, packed me into his truck, took me home, fed me (I love him), and tucked me into bed.

This had two big implications.  First, I had not yet run that day when I got sick. Afterwards, I could hardly walk, much less run. I had to break my streak. That day would have been Running Streak Day 724. So close to 2 years of running every single day.
Second, clearly, I was going nowhere.  The race started at 6 am the next morning and I was more than a 3 hour drive away. Clearly, I was not going to be on the starting line, no matter how good I felt. I was SO UPSET. I cried, and felt sorry for myself, and worried about Michele, running the race alone. In addition to missing the race myself, I had talked Michele into running this race, she had never run this distance before, and I really wanted to be there for her. And I wasn’t. So I felt guilty too.

Juneau Lake, Resurrection Pass trail (photo credit to Michele Harmeling)

Saturday, I felt pretty good, and if I had woken up in Cooper Landing instead of Wasilla, I’m sure I would have run the race. I felt good all day on Saturday, until I had to drive into Anchorage with my daughter to retrieve my car. I didn’t get dizzy or lightheaded again, but I did get pretty motion sick. I was very glad to get home, and promptly went back to bed.

Michele, that wonderful, strong woman, made it about halfway, to the single aid station on the course, and had to DNF after rolling her ankle and having a lot of hip pain. It turned out that she didn’t have to run it by herself, because another runner we both know from other races ran most of it with her, but that was probably a blessing and a curse because they each have very difference paces and race day outlook and strategy. Michele and I are pretty good running partners because we both have similar paces, and we tend to think the same way about racing, and we both get stubborn and sarcastic when the going gets tough, so it works well for us. I’m still very sorry for wimping out on her, and wonder if we would have both made it if we had been together to push each other along.  We make a good team.

Sunday was better, and Monday was better still. Tuesday and today I have had no dizziness or nausea. The pressure in my ear is mostly gone. I feel back to normal. I had a follow up appointment with my primary care doctor. I had spent some of my in-bed time to research vertigo, and I had come to the conclusion that the urgent care doc was wrong in his diagnosis. My primary care doctor agreed, and thought maybe it was labyrinthitis, since I just had a cold, and am still on antibiotics for strep throat. But he gave me a referral to an Ear, Nose and Throat specialist for further evaluation, since this is the second time in a year that I have had severe vertigo that lasted for significant periods of time. I’m currently waiting for the ENT to call me back to make an appointment.

In the meantime, I’ve signed up for another race, A Day at the Beach, in Chugiak. I signed up for the 12 hour race. It’s a 4-ish mile loop on trails that are ski trails in the winter. I ran the 12 hour in 2016, and the 6 hour last year. I’m excited to tackle the 12 hour again this year. Now to convince Michele to run it with me….

Resurrection Pass 50 miler 2017 race report

I wrote this post the day after the race, but never posted it. I’m not sure why.

Resurrection Pass 50 was my second attempt at a 50 mile race, and I was really feeling hopeful and well prepared. The race starts in Cooper Landing, and follows the trail over the pass to Hope. The trail itself is only 38 miles long, so to make a full 50 miles, at close to the halfway point runners had to go down a side trail (Devil's Pass) for 6 miles, and back up. So this race goes uphill steadily for 16 miles or so, 6 miles downhill, then 6 miles back uphill to the junction, another couple miles to the Resurrection Pass summit, then down, down, down for the last 20 or so miles.
There is not a list of required gear, but to run 50 miles in the mountains unsupported but for one aid station, you sort of have to do a lot of planning, and depending on the weather, take a lot of gear with you.

Cooper Landing is about 3 hours from my house, so I drove to Cooper Landing the night before. I slept in the back of my Jeep Cherokee at the trailhead. I got everything ready to go in my hydration pack before going to sleep, but didn’t actually put it in, because I knew I’d have to get the bladder out in the morning to mix Tailwind in, and it’s harder with stuff in my pack. I made two drop bags. One was for the aid station at Devil’s Pass, allegedly at mile 22, and I put half my food, a baggie of Tailwind, a long sleeved shirt and warm hat, and dry socks in it. The other drop bag was for the finish line in Hope, with a change of dry clothes and another, warmer, hat.

I slept in the car, but didn’t sleep well. I almost bought a sleeping pad when I was at REI, but didn’t.  I should have.  I woke up at 4:30, and ate a nutrition bar right away. Got dressed, long tights, t-shirt. I wore a hoodie until just before race start to stay warm. I packed my new Goretex rain jacket that I had just bought at REI. Overall, I wound up being pretty happy with my clothing choices. Until I got cold. More on that later.

After I got dressed, I ate 2 packets of oatmeal with hot water from my Jetboil. Cleaned my bowl and spoon, mixed my Tailwind, packed my hydration pack. Bathroom x2. Ready to go.

Just barely light at race start at 6:00 am. I knew I would be slow, so I started at the back, to avoid everyone passing me. Trail started going uphill right away. I hate starting off uphill, but it warms you up fast. I followed my running coach’s advice, and started off what was actually fairly slow, but it felt hard because my body wasn’t really happy to be moving yet. Wound up behind a guy for a while who was speed hiking the race. His walk was a slow run for me. Finally passed him once I was warmed up a little, but he was never more than a few minutes behind me.

The trail wound through the woods and gradually uphill. Somewhere around mile 5, it leveled out a lot, and I started picking up my pace. Between miles 5 and 10 were my fastest miles of the whole race, except I had to stop a couple times to take care of biological needs. The trail itself was well maintained and mostly pretty smooth and runnable.

After about mile 10, it got somewhat steep again. I was glad my coach said to walk a lot in this section, because I did. The climb on this trail is so gradual, though, that it mostly doesn’t look steep. There’s 4900+ feet of elevation gain in this race, but it doesn’t seem like it, until you try to run fast.

There was supposed to be a turnoff for Devil’s Pass at mile 16. The Resurrection Pass trail is only 38 or so miles long, so you have to run about 6 miles down Devil’s Pass and back up to make the full 50 miles. My GPS said I was at 16.96 by the time I hit the turnoff for Devil’s Pass. I thought I would be able to make good time going down Devil’s Pass, but the trail was not nearly as runnable as the Resurrection Pass trail. I probably should have pushed harder through this section, though.

All boulder fields should look like this.

The Devil's Pass trail is rocky, muddy, etc. I found it more difficult to run. There were a few boulder fields, and stream crossings on boulders. The aid station was supposed to be mile 22, but was mile 23.5 according to my GPS, and I took about a 10-12 minute stop. Changed socks, grabbed a snickers, and more fuel, refilled water. My 2L bladder was just about empty. The volunteer didn’t fill it all the way back up, only about ¾, which wound up being not enough water. Left the long sleeved shirt and warm hat in my bag. Maybe a mistake, because I did get cold later. Rang the cowbell to officially reach the checkpoint. Speed hiker guy came into and left aid station a few minutes behind me, then passed me when I stopped to pee. I never saw him again. He finished an hour ahead of me.

Back up Devil’s Pass. I slipped on a stream crossing, got the fresh socks wet, landed on my hands and knees on the rocks, almost face planted in the stream, but caught myself. That sort of hurt. Took a few minutes to shake it off. Stupid Salomon Speedcross trail shoes are great for most things, but really suck on wet rock.

This is where I fell. This was also my last picture, haha.

I was starting to get tired and walked a lot. I ate a Snickers bar, in two halves, half an hour apart. (Much later I wondered if the elevation could have had something to do with how quickly I tired in this race.)

The summit of Res Pass was supposed to be at mile 30, but was at mile 32 by my GPS. Coach said to push hard approaching the summit. I felt like I had no push. Tired, but still mostly enjoying the race. Around mile 30 or 31 the rain started. Just sprinkles at first, then more. By mile 33 or 34, it was pouring. Puddles everywhere. Wet, slippery trail. Wet feet. Then wet legs, wet, cold hands. I had my new Goretex rain jacket, thank goodness, so my core was dry, but I got chilled. The last 20 miles were mostly downhill, and I had planned to try to run them fast, but I was miserable, cold, wet, sore, tired and just creeping along. I kept telling myself to run faster, and I just couldn’t do it. Trail turned into a stream or huge, ankle deep puddles in most places. I wanted the race to be over so bad and I felt like I would never finish. Ate a king sized Nutrageous bar in 3 sections. That was delicious.

I ate either Skratch or Honeystinger chews every 30 minutes religiously, except when I had the candy bars instead. No major stomach issues or intolerance. Got pretty sick of the chews, but not to the point that I couldn’t force myself to eat them.
Ran out of water/Tailwind at what I thought was 3 miles from the finish, but turned out to be 5 miles. Was too cold and too close to want to stop to filter more water, so I just kept going. Tried catching some rain in my hands, but it didn’t work very well. 
I think the biggest thing slowing me down was my head. I get into a negative thought cycle when I get tired and/or sore, and let myself focus on all the bad things, and it puts me in a downward spiral. I get discouraged, and lose all my energy and motivation. Somewhere around mile 40 I swore I was never running again. By mile 50 by my GPS, I was convinced I was never going to be able to finish the race, even at a walk.

My GPS said 52.5 when I finally reached the trailhead at about 8:40 PM, to find no finish line. I stood there for a few minutes, wondering if I was done, and the RD finally hopped out of his warm, dry car, and asked if I was finishing. I said, “Am I finished?” I was.

I changed into warm dry clothes, and got a ride back to my car. I heated some water in my Jetboil stove and had some dehydrated pad thai that was delicious, and a Hershey bar with almonds. Crawled into my sleeping bag. Slept terribly, because I couldn’t stretch my legs out all the way in my car, and my legs hurt all night. Was awake by 7 am, and heading home.

My legs hurt really bad all day on Sunday, and I ran my one mile pretty painfully at something like a 16:30 mile. And really, it was more of a shuffle than a run.  The next day, they were still really sore, but I felt like I could actually run, slowly, at about a 13:30 pace. By the third day, I was feeling much better and my legs only have a small amount of residual soreness.

I’m really excited to be running this race again this August, and I am hoping I can perform better in the second half than I did last year. I know what to expect, and I feel like I’ve learned a lot about keeping my mind more focused and positive, even when I’m tired. Plus, I’m running it with a friend, Michele, who is always good company and has a sarcastic mouth when she’s struggling, which makes it easier to bear somehow. So we will do fine, I’m sure. LOL.

I've Got This

So, in my last post,  clear back in January, I talked about our trip to Hawaii. I haven’t posted since then, because of a couple of things. First the obvious: life gets hectic and blogging doesn’t get done. I’ve said that before. But seriously, for the last 6 months, my husband and I have been grappling with some pretty big potential changes. I wasn’t ready to talk about them on the blog, but I had a hard time even thinking of anything else. So I didn’t write. 

But now, the hard decisions have been made, and it’s just a matter of planning and execution now. 

So, in January we went to Hawaii. Like I said in my last post, we wound up having long discussions about whether we could live in Hawaii. What I didn’t talk about in that post was what happened when we got home. On January 14, we came home to Alaska, from Hawaii. Thanks to Jeep Uconnect, I was able to start my Jeep as soon as we touched down in Anchorage and I took my phone out of airplane mode. That way, it was nice and warm by the time I got my luggage and we got out to the parking lot. But wait. I'm getting ahead of myself.

I walked out of the airport, fresh from the warm air of Hawaii, into the cold of an Alaskan winter:

This is not the parking lot at the airport. But it is winter.

 took one breath, and that’s when I knew. I didn’t want to live here anymore. I immediately, desperately wanted to turn around and go back. And 6 months later, even in the midst of an Alaskan summer, I haven’t changed my mind.

All winter long, when I would say how much I want to move to Hawaii,  James would say “let’s see if you say that in the summer.” The thing is, sometimes Alaskan summers are pretty freaking awesome. The warm, but not hot, sunny summers, that is. Not the cloudy, chilly rainy summers. Those suck. I was sitting outside the other day, and I had to admit that if Alaska was like this all year long, I probably wouldn’t want to move.

I also totally love that it stays light all night here in the summer time.

(Pic taken at 1:54 am)

But Alaska isn’t like that all year.  Summer in Alaska is mercilessly short, which leads me to the other thing that happened, one that was very sad. A friend and coworker, Jeanni, was in a car accident and killed one Saturday. At her memorial, and also on Facebook, one of our mutual friends told a story about the last time she had seen Jeanni before she passed away.  Jeanni absolutely loved unicorns, and she had come across some fancy unicorn bubble gum. Our other friend encouraged her to open it and have a piece, but Jeanni decided she would save that gum for a special occasion, and settled for chewing some “normal" gum instead. A few days later, she was gone, the gum she was saving for a special occasion,  still unopened. Our mutual friend ended the story by saying “Just chew the damn gum." 

Um, mind blown. Such a simple story about a pack of gum that didn’t matter in the big scheme of things at all, probably not even to Jeanni. But oh boy, it resonated with me. Big time. (Thanks, Amber). At that point, James and I had about figured out that we “eventually” wanted to move to Hawaii, but who knew what eventually meant. Maybe in 3 years when my youngest graduates from high school and we don’t have any more kids at home? Maybe never, and just vacation there every couple years? Who knew?

But seriously. Coming home shifted my mindset. Then hearing that story made it impossible for me to ignore it. I really started thinking, long and hard, about what I really wanted. Alaska has warm weather at most 1/3 of the year. The rest of the time, I just wait for it to come back.  And when the weather is warm, there’s an almost frantic feeling in me that I have to wring out every possible second of enjoyment because it goes by so fast. I’m done with that.

I’m 48 years old, and I’ll be 49 in a few months. I’ll be 50 soon. Right now, I can run, and hike, swim, and snorkel, and I can probably learn to paddle board. I have some health problems that may or may not affect my mobility in the future. I have no idea how long I can enjoy this lifestyle. But I know that I want to enjoy it as much as I can while I can, and I want to make it last as long as possible.  I know that I don’t want to spend 2/3 of the rest of my life (the winters) waiting for the other 1/3 (the summers). That’s just not a good use of my time. Is this what they call a mid-life crisis?

Now that I know what I want, I’m not going to wait any longer than I have to.  And luckily, haha, my husband, while not as downright obsessive about it as I am, is at least ok with it, and willing to go along with my impulsive decisions.

So there it is. What all this talk boils down to is, we are moving to Hawaii:

 as soon as we can make it happen. We still have to get the house ready to sell,  and we don’t want to move our youngest in the middle of a school year, so we are planning for next summer. A lot of things can happen between now and next summer, so nothing is set in stone yet, but preparations have begun. Lists have been made. We've started selling things we aren’t taking with us. It’s going to be a busy, hectic year, but what’s new? I excel at busy and hectic. I’ve got this.